The Wedding Series – Part Two: The Picky Bridesmaid

A bridesmaid has many responsibilities. Sure, remembering the rehearsal part of the Rehearsal Dinner, joining the bride at hair and makeup appointments and making sure the party bus is partying are important but sitting at the Head Table is at the top of the list.

You might be thinking, what’s the big deal? For a picky eater, sitting in the front of hundreds of guests at the reception is a very big deal. It’s like asking Derek Jeter to play the cello at Lincoln Center. He is not meant to play in a string quartet just like a picky eater is not meant to eat stock menu food in front of a crowd. It is something I thought about when I was first asked to join the bridal party and something I prepared for days before the wedding.

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Alex and her picky bridesmaid
My 12:45am flight to Madison was delayed hour-by-hour until 6:30am. Yes, my wedding appointments were cancelled and pre-wedding beauty sleep was sacrificed. Instead of becoming irritated by the numerous delays like most people on the flight, I took advantage of my interrupted travel plans to think about food. More specifically, I wondered if Alex made the right decision choosing my chicken entrée and planned what I would do if she didn’t.

PLAN #1: Secretly place every bite of food in the napkin on my lap and stash it under the table when I “finished” eating. Totally appropriate for a twenty-five year-old bridesmaid, right?

PLAN #2: Make friends with the banquet captain in order to somehow taste all three dishes before dinnertime. There will be time for this in between the wedding speeches and salads, right?

PLAN #3: Hope that one of the bridesmaids orders something other than chicken and convince her to trade with me if I don’t like mine. That’s a normal thing to do with someone I’ve only known for eight hours, right?

PLAN #4: Wait for Toppers. Ty was serious when he said he’d use his Topper’s Credit Card, right?

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The Bridal Party #2hearts1boddy Photo Credit: Erin Moore Photography
I sat down at the Head Table and looked into the crowd of 300 people. Of course, our table was the first served while the other thirty-one tables had nothing better to do than look at us while they waited for their salads.

Normally, my big struggle with salads is that I will only eat French dressing and restaurants never serve it. I wasn’t surprised when it was one of the two dressings served at this midwestern wedding. I ignored the cheese and other toppings on my lettuce and decided I was off to a great start.

Then the entrée was served. The picture of a chicken on the invitation meant chicken breast with pasta, pesto crème sauce and veggies. Yes, that’s right. Pasta. Something every picky eater wants to see on the plate of a pre-determined meal. I quickly scraped the small amount of sauce that was on my chicken and pretended it wasn’t there in the first place. As usual, I only ate the noodles that hadn’t touched any of the sauce.

To be honest, I didn’t eat much. It’s not because the food wasn’t good (the chicken dishes on either side of me were drowning in sauce so I actually feel lucky to consider the whole experience a success) but that I was too excited to eat. Hunger settled in a few hours later, as expected. No sooner did my stomach grumble than I entered the bar area to find boxes upon boxes of – you guessed it – Topper’s Pizza. My only regret of the evening was not starting the “2Hearts1Boddy” hash tag chant at that very moment.

– MW

My duties as a bridesmaid might be over but more wedding festivities for the picky eater are coming!